Throwing down the petals for Spring
She's officially here, despite me welcoming her 3 weeks ago
This week, I am trying to get the motivation to begin the tasks in the garden. I love doing them, I just sometimes feel that I am not good at it. Some of my plants die, and I have to learn to be okay with that, it happens. But, to look into why they died, if I can help more next time, etc. is the problem I have. The follow up education, as it were. Sometimes I wish I was way more into gardening when I was really young, because my paternal Gran had the greenest thumb I’ve ever known. I have several photos of her posing in her gardens, and she is always s serene about it. As if she’s saying “Oh, this ol’ garden? I just threw some seeds down and out popped this orchard of cherry trees, roses, poppies and Queen Anne’s Lace, no big deal.”
Here she is:
Her garden, and the outdoors was something important to her. In her diary, the things she would almost always mention were the weather, and if she did any gardening that day, or things she noticed in the garden. Those things were stable, and were going to happen no matter what. What a great way to ground yourself. How can I bring more of that to my life, when so many other things are beyond my control and my days are filled with stomach-knotting anxiety?
Anyhow, here’s some other items from this week:
I’m thankful for the effervescence of Alka-seltzer. Both in making my stomach feel better, and the ritual of plopping it, waiting, stirring, drinking, waiting for relief. It might be the only ritual of self-care I regular give myself.
Speaking of self-care, the group beverage chat (recently name-changed to frozen donut chat) shared a poem that I fell in love with, that I think y’all should take to heart as well. Called “Tea” by Leila Chatti, my favorite.
“I think to care for the self
is a kind of prayer. It is a gesture
of devotion toward what is not always beloved
or believed. I do not always believe
in myself, or love myself…”
First Day of Spring has come! I knew it would come, but it always feels so refreshing. It’s for sure happening. Also, more selfishly, my birthday is happening in 3 weeks. Aries season is here and my eternal flame is growing from winter bonfire to spring blaze. So please excuse if, for the next month, I mention at least one thing about my birthday celebrations in this space. It’s my space, if you aren’t a fan of me, why would you even be reading this?
